December 12th, Advent Day 16
Sunday school in my childhood church taught me that Jesus loved me and all the fascinating stories of the Old and New Testament. But the sermons during the worship services were scary and sometimes gave me nightmares. I understood we are accountable, and there were consequences for our actions. However, sitting on a hard wooden pew in church listening to someone I didn't even know yell at me that I was going to Hell for a myriad of reasons I didn't understand made no sense. How could Jesus/God be so mean if he loved me? It didn't add up.
As I got older, I tried different churches, but didn't find anywhere I felt I belonged. I so longed for a place where I could take a deep breath, just relax, and feel God's presence. But it was not to be, so I gave up. I did not attend any church for many years.
Life changes brought me to Southern Pines. I met a gentleman who belonged to Emanuel Episcopal Church and invited me to attend with him on Easter Sunday. I had never been inside an Episcopal church. I had heard it called “Catholic light.” I had also heard an Independent Baptist preacher say that all Episcopalians and Catholics were going to Hell because they drink alcohol. I had no idea what to expect, but I brought my Easter bonnet and joined in.
I felt something awaken in me during that Easter service. I loved the unity of participation in the service. We were being led to actively worship and pray. Wow! I felt a warmth that I had not felt in a long time.
There are many ways to glorify God. By looking again, I have found mine.